The power of “SEEN”
I stood outside the classroom, peeked through the window and waited. One by one the teachers, other students, then finally my grandson Luca noticed. His mouth formed a circle, eyebrows raised, and shoulders shimmied with surprise. He immediately started some movements that can only be described as a combination of break dancing and gymnastics. His energy exploded and seemed to influence the other students as they mimicked his movements. It’s one of those memories that he will never remember because of his age, but I will cherish and proudly deposit for the rest of my life.
Luca and I have developed a relationship that flat out puts me into an emotional tailspin every time we say goodbye. He now lives in Florida and yes, we see each other several times a year, but there are some stretches that are much to far apart. His sincere and enthusiastic reaction is proof in the evolutionary power of sight. We are visual animals and up to 50% of our brain is wired for visual processing. With that much brain dedication comes power, and it was a power that I never knew existed as a kid.
They were always there. It didn’t matter what season, what location, what event, they were always there. I ran across a picture recently when I was a sophomore in high school and playing basketball. Over my left shoulder I can see my parents sitting in the bleachers as well as my high school football coach. At that point in my life, I just took their presence for granted. I was clueless to the fact that not all parents or coaches are that committed.
Now as a long-time educator and coach, I clearly see the tremendous positive domino effect that comes with an appearance at an event. I was blessed to become a head football coach later in my career. My wife and I were empty nesters as our twins were off to college. This freed up time for Kathy and I to go to school plays, choir performances, or other athletic events that my student/athletes were involved in. It was never spoken out loud, but our attendance at those events carried the weight of care and interest.
It's so easy to dismiss when decision time comes..should I go??? “They will never notice, they won’t realize I am there,” your mind justifies your decision not to go. But time and time again I have heard the statement, “coach… you have no idea how much we appreciate you being here!” The decision to attend has in turn made me a better person. A person who is now committed to developing the entire student/athlete, versus a person that was only concerned with wins and losses. Another benefit of maturity and becoming a head coach later in life.
Vision can also be powerful during routine everyday situations. As a teacher, I strongly believe in MBWA. Learned very early in my teaching training, “Management by walking around.” The sheer proximity to a group of students has prevented countless misbehaviors just before they were to ignite. Continual movement in the classroom helps to create a business-like work atmosphere as the students know they are monitored and held accountable. As a coach during practice, movement from one position group to another as they are drilled carries the message that they are just as important as any other group.
The old adage goes, “a picture is worth 1000 words.” Body language will scream a sentiment whether you want it to or not. As a coach your reaction to errors or missteps is sending a contagious message. I have failed countless times to the instinctive overdramatic response of a negative play. That response provides no benefit to the athlete involved or to the members of the team. Steadfast positive body language and encouragement that focuses on the next play is the reaction that master coaches display.
As a senior in high school, I was lucky to have my parents and both my older brothers at nearly every single game I played. Brother John was a college grad and working locally. Brother Jim was struggling to find a teaching job in Michigan in the early 80’s. He was offered teaching positions down in Texas which was booming at the time. He made the decision to wait until the end of my senior year to make the move. As I reflect some 40 years later, I realize the impact my parents had on all three of their sons. We were blessed and we were loved.
I head to Florida this Friday and my memory bank will make another cherished deposit. Upon sight of my 2-year-old grandson, both our hearts will be filled and the power of SEEN will overtake our emotions once again. I am simply following the footsteps of two incredible parents. John and Linda Glodich, thank you for the unwavering support through both my athletic and coaching career. Thank you for being impactful role models as both parents and grandparents. I know you are watching and we are SEEN through that special window in heaven.